Friday, March 18, 2011

Don't Forget to Remember

11:15 pm last night, I finally make it to bed. 11:30pm, one of the babies starts fussing and I realize that he isn't going to settle himself back down. So I get up and head to the nursery to tend to him. Put a binkie in his mouth, pat his little back for a minute, and he falls back asleep. Because I had only been in bed for about 15 minutes, I hadn't really even fallen asleep yet. The woman's brain is much different from the man's brain, in that a man can shut his mind off and fall asleep in about ten seconds flat. While a woman lays in bed for 30 minutes, or upwards of an hour, or more before her mind finally settles and she can fall asleep. So, after 15 minutes of being in bed, my woman's brain was still buzzing with thoughts and I was far from asleep. My mind was still somewhat sharp, and not in the "its 4am and I would be lucky if I have accomplished more than 30 minutes of sleep yet tonight" complete delirium mode.

As I stood over my youngest twin's crib, making sure that he had completely fallen back asleep, I felt a sudden overwhelming feeling of nostalgia. Something hit me, and I took a moment to look around the room and feel it. Everything felt whimsical. Like in a dream. The soft and gentle dim lighting that radiated throughout the entire space, highlighting every grove and curve on those sweet babies' faces. The cribs positioned at opposing sides of the room, directly beside their individual dressers. Dressers upon which their little stuffed animals sit and watch over them throughout the night. It was exactly how I had always pictured the room that my newborn baby would reside in. Only, I had 2 babies residing in this one. Exactly what I had never pictured. That fact, that there were two, amplified the feeling. The nostalgia. I thought in that moment, that I never want to forget this. Ever. Ever ever.

Of course we take pictures, and videos. But nothing can compete with a person's memory. A parent's memory. Because memory has the ability to record imagery, which cannot be captured in a photo or a video.

There's something about cliche's. They always seem to present themselves in abundance during times where emotions are magnified. "Don't forget to remember the small things". "You're gonna miss this". "It goes by so fast, and then you look back and ask -Where did the time go?-". That's why you cant forget to remember. To take in those little moments and bank them in your memory. Absorb every second, because its true, the cliches are so true. And you never want to forget. Never, ever ever.

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